Katya & Arkin’s Wild Ride
Arkin and Katya team up with Lugos and inadvertently start a war.
Carnage!
Clockwork Cutthroat Cuts Cops, Crashes Criminal Conspiracy!
The manor of DECKHERD HALL, a known meeting spot for CRIMINALS and SMUGGLERS, played host to a BLOODY MASSACRE this evening past.
The victims included OFF-DUTY OFFICERS OF THE CITY WATCH and ROGUE VIGILANTES (known as the GRAY CLOAKS) who had occupied portions of the house for reasons of CONSPIRACY AND PLOTTING. However, a PAIR OF DISGRACED ACADEMICS from an UNNAMED GANG OF THIEVES spotted this sit-down, and were subsequently HUNTED by the RENEGADES.
The chase turned bloody when LUGOS THE CLOCKWORK ASSASSIN (stuck as a head these past eight centuries, now returned to function), struck by a STRANGE AFFINITY for one of the professors, interfered on their behalf. This terrible threesome, led by the ancient assassin, enacted BLOODY AND SILENT MURDER upon the Bluecoats and Gray Cloaks, leaving NO SURVIVORS.
The trio was subsequently confronted by the enigmatic LORD SCURLOCK, who-
The woman in the darkened room stops her writing, and squints at what she has written. She sniffs the paper, a look of disgust on her face, and then tears it to pieces.
“Scurlock!” she rasps with a voice that recalls a rusted guillotine, “SCURLOCK!” Soundlessly, almost without perceptible motion, Lord Scurlock emerges from the shadows. He wears a vest, shirtsleeves, and breeches, and his forearms are covered in blood. Nevertheless, he bows with a practiced courtly grace.
“Your Ladyship,” he intones, a pantomime of respect dripping from every syllable, “How may I-“
“Explain!” she interrupts, throwing the shreds of paper at him, “You showed yourself to them! Why? Had they not found Lugos? Had they not sought him out? Why risk having your hand in this be detected?”
“I am simply being mindful, your Ladyship. ‘Thrice finds, thrice again binds, thrice thrice and you’re mine’. Given that this was the first third, I thought-“
The woman growls at this, and blue light begins to sizzle behind her eyes. The loose paper beneath her fingers begins to crackle and burn.
“Oh, I know what you thought, Scurlock. You thought you’d bind them for yourself, didn’t you? Not to Lugos, or I, or to the entire enterprise . . . no, you want to be the only hand on the tiller. You want this to be YOUR moment of triumph. Not OURS, not the Emperor’s. YOURS.”
She begins to rise into the air. Her dusty robe begins to scorch away as lightning crackles across her body. Scurlock, though still, begins to look uncomfortable.
“I will remind you one last time, Scurlock, so heed it well: all of this is for the Emperor. This little group of thieves is for the Emperor. The stone prison beneath the waves is for the Emperor. Lugos, you, even I, ALL OF us are FOR THE EMPEROR. That is IT. That is ALL. There is NOTHING ELSE. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?”
After a moment of hesitation, Lord Scurlock bows his head. His voice, when it emerges, is laced with genuine fear.
”. . . Yes, your Ladyship. Of course. I’m sorry.”
The woman returns to the ground, and the lightning recedes. She picks up her pen nonchalantly, and continues writing.
“Very good. That will be all. Now, let’s see . . . Ah, yes . . .”
Obituaries
We are saddened to report the passing of ROBERT SPANZERVICH, better known by his nom de guerre SEVEROSI BOBBY. Reports indicate that he fell or was pushed from a height after suffering a sudden incapacitating electroplasmic shock.
Severosi Bobby was known throughout Coalridge as a mountain of a man, and a pillar of his community. A sailor by trade, he spent much of his life upon the sea, helping to hunt the dread Leviathans that keep our city safe and illuminated. In his hours of leisure, he was often found at the Sparkwright’s Institute in Coalrdige, where he spent many an hour as a volunteer handyman and general security. A utopian, Severosi Bobby believed in the development of alternative energy sources, and was often known to remark that an alternative to Leviathan ichor might put an end to his employment, but he’d “happily sit on dole if Doskvol’s future is secured.”
Severosi Bobby is survived by his brother, Severosi Robert, and his parents, Severosi Mike and Severosi Gertrude. At the request of the family, all well-wishers are asked to donate to the Stray Puppies and Kittens Trust, as this was a cause very near to Severosi Bobby’s heart.